Do vagina's smell?
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
Also, new rule: You are no longer allowed to send me a text with the word "dildo" in it before 10am.
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
Randomize
