i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
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