If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
Randomize
