his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
A client gave me a bottle of vodka today. And he was hot with a beard. It's like he knows my soul.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
This is classic penis vs brain.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
