Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
My dermatologist just asked me, "what happened here?" referring to the bruising on my nipples. I told her I walked into a door. Thanks for that awkward moment.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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