Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
Randomize
