...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Randomize
