i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
I spilled a beer on myself, so I went back to my place to change. The city marshall was at my door with a warrant. That beer cost me 760 bucks.
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize
