I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
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