i just walked in on my sister drunkenly sobbing to sarah mclachlan. its time for an intervention.
didn't that happen to you last weekend?
shut up.
you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
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