When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
Randomize
