Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
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