kristin has been a bad kristin
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
so my phone autocorrects 'retard' to 'retaaahd'. i LOVE being a masshole!
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
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