Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
