Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
Randomize
