Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
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