i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
So I have $4.22 in my bank account, just wrote a check for a tooth brush from quikmart, and bought a 25 cent condom from the bathroom. i don't know whats more sad, my bank account or the fact that i'm entrusting my entire future to a condom machine that was probably last filled in 1970
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
Randomize
