I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
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