I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
Randomize
