whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
Randomize
