what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
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