I hate all girls vehemently.
Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
Randomize
