JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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