I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
pop tarts are not kleenex
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
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