Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
One of my friends took me out last night for a bday celebration and I just now remembered that a man blew fire balls across the bar in honor of my birthday... How drunk do you have to be to forget that?
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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