Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
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