Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
