last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
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