She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
Randomize
