who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
You're like the curious george of whores
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
Randomize
