i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
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