lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Randomize