The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
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