Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
Thanks for FaceTime'ing with that ugly chick last night while me and her friend were in the other room. it's good to know I can still count on my wingman even when we're 2000 miles apart
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
he had hair everywhere except his balls
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
Randomize
