I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
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