I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
Remember that St. Patrick's Day when I fucked your married coworker in his truck and the whole bar was chanting for you "Don't fuck Mike"?! #TheLuckOfTheIrish 🍀
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
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