Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize