North Korea, Best Korea!
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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