next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
Randomize
