talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
Bro, I met the coolest hottest chick tonight and she has the hottest friends.
Where are you?
Strip Club
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
Randomize
