Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
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