That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
