The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Randomize
