we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
Randomize
