She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
Randomize