i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
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