Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
It's never too late to be topless.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
Randomize
