someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
Randomize
