UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
Randomize
