Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
I'm eating all of the evidence.
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
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