i passed out on the floor in my hallway and woke up with my dog licking himself 2 inches from my face. my first reaction? envy
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Randomize